Monday, December 29, 2008


I cant believe 2k8 is finally over. i must say its been the shortest year of my life filled with all sorts of happenings.
For starters, i made so many new friends. Had too many parties in my house that i have decided come 2k9 i'll charge everyone who wants to hold a party there. Been to almost all the bars in town and most of the highly billed social events in town. Enough of all that sh*t. The weekly rock night and friday binges, a'ma drop them to once or twice a month in the new year.
Ive also been a regular to church but mostly on weddings and funerals.(definately has to change next year). A number of people i know have passed on this year. The first being in around March. Santos a very talented cricketer passed on. Come May and another great sportsman Ox (Oketcho Wilbrod) passed on. June 28, the most hurting; Philip tendo drowned while on study holiday in Uganda. Exactly a month after PIP, Jesse Kagoda fell from garden city and died. Come september, ma uncle Tom died from pneumonia just 3 days after the son's wedding. Yu can now imagine how many funeral services i attended.
It is in the same year that i quit my job. This wasn't the normal resignation where you write a resignation letter, given a good luck pat on the back by fellow staff and a package from management for a job well done. I ended my job in a fist fight with my boss of barely 2 months.
Stayed home for a good one month and later got another very interesting job on paper and in the pocket but very very boring in practice. still hanging in their though.
In this same year i got to meet the very elite, kind and very humourous Ugandans known as the bloggers. These guys and ladies are for "world...". Their parties are a must attend and the monthly BHHs yu only miss if you must. I have learnt alot from their various posts and also been entertained a great deal. Bloggers ye rock.
This year i havent been so close with my family memebers except my camppus sister whom i always keep so close. She's enjoyed more of ma soft earned dimes to which i have no regrets as i'd rather run broke than have a ki-sugar daddy provide for her. Which reminds me its this same gal that almost gave me a heart attack when she boldly introduced some ka-guy as her boyfriend. Still trying to find out which bars this dude goes to.
As regards relationships, i have managed to stay out of one although i was active. Met the most beautiful to the non performers and the craziest gals in Uganda. This was the year of "pick ups". Not even in my campus days did things come that easy. The ultimate was ma mulokole wench whom i told straight up ours was going nowhere. As the year drifted by, my luck seemed to be drifting away as well. However, the end has been a happy one.

And the greatest sport/ activity/ pass time this year was Spin the Bottle. the saying goes, "one good turn............."

I think am ready to take on 2k9 and am dropping most of my crazy habits as her flight is one day away.

Otherwise, may yu all have a blessed new year and lets keep the fire burning.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

What do yu think?

Its been a while since i last posted here.My life's just been the same old. An outing here, a house party there, a brokenheart along the way, etc etc.

Just yesterday i had a job interview. This is a really good job with a good salary (yet to confirm how much) and alot of benefits. Two issues here.First I haven't gotten the job yet although i left a great impression on the panel.The MD didnt hesitate to tell me before i left the interview room. Second issue is that i have been on my current job for only 4 months now. My current job was interesting in the first month only. Apparently my immediate boss is based in Nairobi and the other in RSA. The pay is very good; actually in Obama's currency. No one to follow me around. All the good things you would wish for in a job.However, this job ceased to be interesting after the first month. It is now very boring. Imagine a job where everyday at 3pm yu are at yo desk dosing away due to lack of what to do. I am only busy on only Wednesday and fridays of some weeks. This job is totally boring. No challenges. Everything is just flat. Call the airline company to confirm cargo arrival. Send someone to pick the documents and thats a day gone. Following day get in touch with another firm that handles the clearance with customs and find out how far they've gone with the customs clearance. Third day find out if cargo is delivered to client's premises. Thats a week gone. Can you imagine. this job is not helping me in my career growth.
It is for this reason that i decided to find something else to do. Get to work, outline my tasks for the day and make sure i dont leave office till all tasks are accomplished. That way i'll get some personal satisfaction and at the end of the month enjoy my monies for a job well done.
Asked a few friends for advise and some said i should hang in here as things may brighten up in the near future while others can't believe ive stayed on this job this long.
My people what should i do? Even if i don't get this new job i was interviewed for, i still have so many other opportunities out there.

On a different note, there are so many company xmas parties going on and mine being a one man company in Uganda, there wont be a party for me. However, i plan on having the biggest corporate party. It started yesterday by going to the cinema to watch Eagle eye. Its a good movie. Today true Body lies, Wednesday a drink for me self. The party is to stretch all the way to the start of next year.

January 3rd is also fast approaching. A very beautiful lady is returning to Uganda from France that day. Between Jan 3rd and 1st February.............simanyi. We are both very excited. One problem tho; she wants us to try out some new stuff which am not ready to try out. i am not going to do it in the OTHER opening.

Back to the new job. Once i get it, it may entail me to leave my lovely town of Ntinda as the offices are far away from Ntinda. Maybe if that rumour about getting an office ride is true.

Otherwise may yu all have a blessed festive season.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

My latest visit to Kampala City

Just yesterday i went to the city centre in a long time.
Was for a friend's wedding meeting which was so much fun and miserable as well.
The fun bit came that i met so many long lost campus friends and not fun
coz i was fined so heavily that i almost went home with nothing. Crime being i
was holding small meetings within the general wedding meeting that everyone had gone for.

Anyway, i realised that there are so many changes in Kampala city after a long time without being there.
There were so many new buildings, i saw a beautiful green park around railway house.That place infront of club rougue. And my God, traffic jams are still massive in Kampala. I also saw a new Bank directly opposite Kenya Commercial Bank. The way i gazed one would think i was from Kabale and in Kampala for the first time. Mateos looked so lovely that i had to drop by for a sweating beer.
Okay, i am not from the village and neither am i coming from outside countries. I am from Nalya and i work in Kampala. I work just near new Vision offices. Every morning i leave home for work and stop just after Lugogo. In the evening i return home after making the occassional stop over at my bank, supermarket, and bufundas all located in Ntinda trading centre. There is absolutely no need for me to go to the city centre. All i need ranging from groceries, recreation, medicines, banking services, laundry services, house brokers, schools and cinema i can get. Ntinda has its problems like the occassional traffic jams, the very poor state of roads(which part of kampala has good roads), poor drainage but they don't match upto what is in the city.
Its only last evening that i sat down and pondered what real development could look like. Just these few facilities and services i get from my local town make me feel so good. I save alot on transport costs, i can plan my travels very well, shopping is less tiresome and i dont have to scramble with alot of people for good services. Wonder if our country was really developed. How happy and healthy we would all be.
But again kudos to all the Ugandan people for always having a smile on their faces and ever looking so beautiful regardless of all the hard times we go through.

In a related incident let me tell yu about a very close friend who told me a very fuuny experience he went through. This dude was born in Mulago and raised in the Makerere flats. Was always dropped and picked from primary school, went to Kings college Buddo and Makerere College school for high school. While at University, he was commuting from home. His parents then shifted to Ntinda and he now works with Bank of Africa Ntinda Branch. A stone's throw away from his home.
One day this dude is at Crested Towers and has an appointment at MTN Towers but he doesn't know where it is located. He parks his vehicle and decides to use a boda boda. Boda guy asks for ugx 1000 to get him there. Dude rides past the crested towers round about slopes down to the road leading to shimoni(ex-shimoni), turns to the lower entrance of crested towers and heads to MTN towers.Time to pay the ugx 1000.Was that worth ugx 1000.
So i dont know what to call that, being spoilt or overly spoilt.
One or two of you may know this dude. Please go ahead and tell him i shared his story here. I'll settle our score over a "Uganda-wa" at our fav. kafunda in Ntinda this evening.

This dude has too many crazy experiences. I'll tell yu about him soaking and washing his suits and ties plus the results obtained.

Big love..............

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

The strange turn of my life

Of late i just can't explain the twist my life has taken.
I am not the old very charming and outgoing person i used to be.
No more pretty girls around me. Of late its the not so good looking,
very hard working and ready for marriage chics that seem to be attracted
to me. All these are so well off financially and holding very influential
positions of responsibility. All these ladies i met as my clients and due
to my excellent customer care skills we became friends. I wonder if they
were never educated on the fact that biz and pleasure dont mix.
To be precise three of these ladies have confessed their feelings and the
idea of us being an item and an envy to many.

Am wondering where did all my bu-lovely, ready to have fun, friends with
benefits go. Am working now, dress so fine, very very mature, focused, very set carrer wise with a place of my own. I have never lost ma rich sense of humour but things are falling apart. Back in the days i didnt have all these things but " I was the man".
About ma social life, i don't have a thing for classy places anymo. I go out
almost everyday of the week but it is to my kafunda in ntinda and then home.
I always keep company of the boys and its only on a few weekends that i may
be in company of a very tight marking old time fling.
There is a way these mamas have failed to let me go even when i dont call them, don't flatter them as i used to my bu-flings, and never remember their birthdays. One is 38years with a 8 year old son and believes we can still have something. She has pleaded with me to keep one of her rides but ive refused giving all kinds of excuses. She promised to fuel and service it on a regular. That one ive refused to fall for. I can still stand the conductors' smelly armpits untill i buy my own ride. These ladies shower me with niceties and i feel so bad coz i heard some ladies discuss that men are nowadays detoothers as well.
Am getting so fed up with this life. When i meet the bu-flashy chics i simply look(not stare), appreciate and move on without saying a word. These are the nice things am looking for in life but my once over flowing confidence is gone. Those who knew me a few years back can testify.
Am very worried coz i seem to be loosing grip on life. I just cant say anything nice to anyone, rarely appreciate good things, and don't spend on people no more. This is because i dont have anyone to do goods things to and for. Only nice thing left in me is the "please" and "thank you" words and an expensive gift to ma kid sis once in a while. Otherwise am so indifferent.

Just wanna get back to ma old self. The old party loving geezer with so many niceties around me. Yes, it was expensive but less taxing and worrying than being sorrounded with old "minyamas" all waiting for the day ill propose to them. You may wonder why i dont assure these ladies but i have. Told them of my fiancee and 2 kids living in France and coming to Uganda on holiday on January 3rd 2009, but none seems to remember or show signs of withdrawal.( Okay it is a lie, i have no kids but truth is "SHE" is coming for holiday on that date)

Its only last evening that i seemed to regain my old touch. Went to the cinema to catch "Quantum of Solace" and met some of my old nice things. Managed to interact with a few of them and get their digits. Hope that is the return of my favourite personality otherwise i am loosing it.

At times i wonder if i had too much fun too early in life or that this is the reward i get for the very many hearts i unintentionally broke years back.

Anyone been here before? Advise please

Monday, October 27, 2008

What a weekend

Last weekend was such a good one till saturday evening.
As usual i went out for ma saturday work out at MUBS
play ground. On arrival i immediately changed into my soccer gear and hit the field.
Two hours later and we are back to the cars to discuss who has improved in skill and who had sex the previous night basing on their performance on pitch.
10 minutes into the discussion and one of us realises that the car doors were open.
Damn, all our things were gone. My rucksack containing my clothes, my two phones, my wallet, 2 health cards, my ATMs, identity cards, watch, 2 hankies are all gone. My wallet was containing a good some of money that i was meant to give to ma little campus sister. This i always do to avoid her getting involved in cross generation sex for dimes. some dimes were to pay for my sarturday pint.
Anyway, that was what befell us. This guy took about 500 thou in cash, 8 mobile phones, plenty of documents he wont use and ATMs whose pin cards he doesnt have.
Everyone who lost stuff went into a panic. Wishing they had left stuff back home, but as they say yu cant fight fate.

However, the most amazing thing is that after realisng we had been robbed, we did the next "automatic" thing which was to try calling the phones. All the other phones were switched off except one of mine. Dude picks up bulungi and goes on to say that the fon was his. After alot of questions and laughing at me, he goes on to say, i quote, "........muli awo muli mukajuzza naye nange ndi mukola" directly translated as "........yo there working out as i also work(stealing)."
One of us tries to negotiate with the thief to return our dox and we give him money. Dude laughs and asks for 300 thousand. We bargain to 100 thousand. Remeber he had taken around 500 thousand in cash and property worth 2 million shillings.There was no way he would return said stuff.
Next thing was to hit Jinja road police station to get police letters lest our dox are found at crime scenes and we are held responsible. Got to the police, narrated our ordeal and one "sheeeeeeee" cop goes like "that is negligence". I was almost put in for assaulting an officer at his duty station. After spending more than 2 hours we were told to return the following day as they could not write down all the statements. Yes, they write on paper as there are no computers or type writers in our police stations.
When we returned the following day,officer in charge took us to a private office to have our police letters made. Dude asked us for 100 thousand shillings to have our letters made. What the fcuk is wrong with our country. We had lost alot of property and money and this fool is asking for money and not 20 thousand but 100 thousand.
We promised that we would return but never did.
Am going back to the station this evening and if he gives me the same bullsh*t, ill scream so loud.......bribe bribe bribe.

Anyway that was ma weekend. No phone, no ATM, no money. Can't believe i lost all ma pretty chics' numbers. Some numbers i'd just gotten at a house party on friday night. My empire of chics has gone down crumbling just like that. I'll be back...........

Hope yu guys had a good weekend.

Words of wisdom

This is not an original post but it was the favourite quote of my departed friend Philip.
Thought i'd share these words as they are such strong words of wisdom.

" Its not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again.Because there is no effort without error and shortcomings, he who knows the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the high achievemnet of triump and who at worst, if he fails while daring greatly, knows his place shall never be with those timid and cold souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

R.I.P. Tendo Philip, Kapale, Pip, Pips, Boyii, etc

Friday, October 17, 2008

getting drunk

These chaps had really lost it.
Anyone been in this situation b4?




Wednesday, October 15, 2008

my house

Lately i havent been so in love with my house.
It is not the beloved pretty house i always looked forward to returning to after a long days work.

It all started when my rent arrears were due. IMF as i call my boss had wired my funds but hadnt gotten onto ma account which seemed a weak story for ma landlady to buy.
Did i tell yu my landlady is Matembe, yes Miria Matembe. That lady who wanted all male defilers castrated. So b4 i paid i always left home very early and returned ery late in the night. I think that somehow affected the bond i had built between me and my beautiful home.

At ma place i have a house help called Andrew who used to be such a nice chap. He would clean the house on a daily, wash the dishes, make our beds (that wasnt his role guess he be'z looking for stray coins. Andrew would wash my clothes and also iron them. In turn i pay him at end month plus a ka-2k here and there, plus a piece of pizza or kabizzi once in a while. Did i mention he'd watch free telly.
But of late Andrew cleans when he want. Yu go home and house is filthy, dishes dirty and yo socks are in the corridor where yu left em the revious night. I leave him clothes to wash in the morning and yu'll find him starting on them at 7pm as yu return from work.
We used to send Andrew to Ntinda to buy us food, or to the nearby shop for beer but of late he has added a new word to his busy.
Kaleeee, come end month he'll see.

The biggest(in size) asset in my house is ma fridge. I used to be so in love with my fridge. This' because it used to be smiling all the time i'd open its door. This always made me smile in turn. The lovely fresh fruits, milk, tomatoes (tho i rarely cook) but they are such a ppretty sight, and ofcourse my beers. By the way i drink any beer brand so my visitors were always cartered for. But of late i dont know whats happening. I open my fridge and simply frown. In the few seconds i looked in there, all i see is a 5litre jerrycan of water, chilli from the last round of home delivered P.I.G, some gnut paste, a half drunk beer, ntula (dont know there english name) and i dont know who put em there. Anyway it aint a pretty sight and i hate ma fridge of late.

Moving on to my bedroom, maan things are all messy.
Househelp doesnt make ma bed no more. So i come home late at times a bit intoxicated and getting into bed is a disaster. Everything i used in the morning while getting set for work is on the bed. The comb, lotion, perfume, wet towel, and clothes. so imagine am from my fav. kafunda, very tired and thats how i find my bed.
I previously used to like my house coz things like mosquitoes i'd only hear from friends i considered unlucky and lived in wetlands. Nowadays these bu-guys are my roomates. In the day they chill in my closet and at night they come around my bed to feast.In the mornings i dedicate a cool 10 minutes to killing thease monsters that my room now needs a new coat of paint probably red.

As if this is not misery enuff the MULTICHOICE guys decide to disconnet my pay TV on sunday. Man this house is miserabole without TV. Local TV reception is so poor so yu cant see a thing. That is if there are any good programmes anyway. I really reallyy missed to see sheila move out of BBA3. I wanted to see that boy's tears.( remind me if she is a gal)

Have i mentioned that i have a housemate. Oh yeah. Me and him are good friends since childhood. We have been going on well till he and the galfriend started having fights. For starters galfriend is a first year campuser who occassoinally comes in on friday to sunday. This chic cant cook(tried once and we ordered her never to do it again), cant wash dishes nor clean house and drinks too alot. She drinks my wine, my beer, vodka, tequila, even malwa nad kasese. Not that i dont want her to drink, but ladies shd stick to one drink. If it is malwa let it be.
Anyway of late these two are always fighting. Miserable looks allover our house.Nobody is willing to talk to me after a fight so i decide to stay away lest they make me misearable as well.
One day i was awaken by her "sound tracks" only for housemmate to emerge from the room 45 minutes later and assuring me that its over between the 2 of them. Left me wondering if that was a farewell "shine".
But bu-young gals....aha. On sunday am trying to watch local TV and housemates' galfriend screams from the bedroom......."J please kol me when Barbarita starts. Almost shot back..F**k Barbarita"

My pretty house used to be an attraction to many young bu-gals especially campusers. This is because it was a venue to very many house parties, always had a constant supply of alcohol, pork was a call away, but now, wapiiiiiiiiii.

The bu-gals always call wondering if they should come visit but i lie that am away for days. What with the dirty house, mosquitoes, gloomy faces, no TV, no alcohol, Andrew wont run to the shop no more.

Just wondering how i can get back my ex lovely house.

Did i tell yu i left no airfreshner in the washroom this morning!

Monday, October 13, 2008

meeting the family

Saturday 11th october marked a landmark in my blog life.
I met the real guys.

Friday night and am in the best bar in Kla ( Rock Katalina as it has the cheapest beer. ugx 1500 everyday) having a polite one with the boys when i get a text from Antipop inviting me for a bloggers drink up the following day. I had 2 other parties to attend on that day but none seemed a better idea that meeting the bloggers.
Come saturday and the excitement is on though i didnt know what to expect. All i knew was that i was going to meet very intelligent, witty and Ugandans who speak very good English.
Time check 08.00pm and i finally meet the group. Didnt talk much with everyone but the whole group seemed adorable.
Antipop i knw and she was looking ever so hot.
Rev is a cool guy and i commend him for having such neat "locks".
Chanel is a great lady and such a lovely host.
Ivan was on top of his game. Dude is sooooo funny.
B2B seemed so down to earth but very intelligent.
Solomom is such a cool guy.

And oh yea, i met Detamble as well. Beautiful lil'white gal i must say.

Basically evening was fun.Plenty to eat and drink.

And being me, i happened to make acquaintances with another pretty lady at the drink up although she aint a blogger. The next day Sunday when i went to support the Ug Vs Benin game at Namboole, i had female company.

All in all it was great. One day i'll never forget.
Ma boys picked me up late and they were all surprised to know that i was indeed a blogger. One actually wondered if i simply wasnt fluking as he's never known me to be that

And to all the bloggers that day, thanx for letting me join the family.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

My savedee belle

I must say am enjoying my new job.
Fat cheque, no boss (my immediate boss is in Nairobi), no reporting or closing time, and recently i added someone else to this list.
There is this "saved" chic that am supposed to be working with. As in she cordinates my company and ours. This is yo typical beautiful Ugandan lady. In the beginning i had absolutely no interest in her besides work issues untill word went round that she was a born again. She goes to church every morning b4 coming to work.
Either i am the devil itself or i just like challenges. I started seeing this lady in another context. I saw a beautiful gal who was missing out on something. I am too detrminedto find out about her real life.
My internal calls to her increased, the compliments became so regular,i satrted seeing her in another context. Se is also a regular at my colleagues desks especially the ones directly in my view. Actually am seeing her now as i type this piece.
What even made matters worse is some other lady at work spilled out Savedee's secret tha she had a thing for "the new guy at work". Actually the new boss at work. (selefu)
We hit it on so well with this born again lady. We always talk and ask questions about each other.One day she inquired about my love life and i didnt hesitate to give her my winning profile...." i have 2 kids living with their mom in France." Funny but this profile has never let me down.
On to my other side that is the lounger in me, little was there to talk about. I am this kind of guy that never talks to my workmates every saturday morning for fear of making them drunk as well. My eyes are bloodshot and at half mast each saturday morning. That kind of guy who considers the bar as my second sitting room.
So i ask her what she thinks of guys like me! Her answer threw me back.........."I love the bar" is what she said.She went on to ask me where it was written that born agains dont go the bar. Its at this moment that i asked to buy her a drink this weekend and she answered in the affirmative. I dont know what kind of drink she does but am eagerly waiting for saturday to hit the bar in the company of a very beautiful born again lady.

I dont know if the good Lord shall ever forgive me cos this will be the second born agian chic am taking to the bar. The firs was another workmate at my former job. That one we split up so badly as she had gotten so into me and was willing to cross to my world. This time, i wont go the full mile as am planning on pulling out after this saturday.

Someone out there help me and find a cure to my uncontrollable bad habit of flirting.

I enjoy it though..........

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Relationships gone bad

In the past few months ive really been proud of myself.
So many friends have been coming to me for some guidance on how to go about with their faultering relationships. Its so funny but all these have been gals.
I don't know if i am really that friendly or seem one who can keep secrets, or maybe am just a nice guy.

Been approached by many bu-nice gals but ill look at three that really moved me.

First there is this nice "bootylicious" gal from western Uganda who came to my house for a drink up. We made acquaintances and later exchanged numbers. In the following days, we sould exchange calls. I then invited her home one day to test my cooking skills. I must say we had a good time. A really good time. Next day she asked to visit again, and because i was jobless and was staying home i accepted. Its on this day that i assured her i was a fther of two living with their momma in France.( By the way this has won me so many followers, stalkers, admirers, and so much trouble).
She also opened up and told me of her boyfriend with whom things weren't going on so well. It also turned out that i knew the guy but i didnt disclose this to her. She told me of how dude wasn't calling no more, how she would call and he didn't pick, or when he picked he would assure her how he was busy with his friends all of whom where gals because he would mention their names. On this day she asked for my phone to call the guy as he would not pick if he saw her number. She went ahead and called using my phone . When the guy picked she almost went on her knees begging hin not to hand up as it was an important call.Dude hang up.
I was now confused, why was this chic clinging onto this dude after al this! Reply was, when we are together he is so lovely. My advise to her was to move on, period. Saw her yesterday and she told me her and Brian where finally over but still they were still in touch. I asked her if he ever calls and she answered in the affirmative. So i wondered, why call now when its over!

Second case was this beautiful young gal who had the meanest boyfriend you'd ever meet. Gal is so beautiful that i would make a move if Antipop wasn't ma..........(4 another time). Anyway for this one, her boyfriend sits her down one day and tells her its over between the two of them. just like that. On asking why, he goes like....." honey i love yu so much. I also love my family sooooooooooooo much. I love my mom and i need a gal i can introduce to my mom and that gal is not you."
Can yu believe that? So this little heartbroken sista is asking me J., am i that bad? Do yu think i deserve this? All i said was no yu dont deserve such a looser. Move on baby, and out we went for her favourite ice cream.

There is also this pretty very intelligent young gal who runs a computer software firm. Hers was a case of lack of communication with boyfriend who is out there pursuing further studies. She says this dude calls only once in 2 weeks. He has access to internet everyday but never ever replies her emails.
This gal recently met a hot dude who she really likes and treats her like a lady. Dude is such a getleman, takes her for expensive dinners, buys her expensive gifts and is so kind to her. He has clearly showed he has interest in this gal. He is also aware that she has a boyfriend out there. Actually Mr. Nice guy is moving to another E.African Country and would like to take her along.
To further complicate this gal's situation is that someone she refers to as her best friend has back stabbed her. This is someone she has been telling all her secrets, shares her everything with, u know how ladies can be. So-called best friend is now dating her ex-boyfriend. She feels so betrayed and belives best friend could even have told her boyfriend about Mr. Nice Guy thats why he aint communicating no more. This lady is so confused so she runs to me with these three issues. Im confuesd as well so someone out there please help.

Three beautiful girls, all being trapped in the love triangle. Not receiving what they deserve. Wish i was living my old skool life coz i'd be having three lovely ladies to share my bed with.....ofcourse not at once.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Pushing the wrong button

In life we can never stop learning.
To some of us we thought we had learnt some of life's lessons the heard way but we haven't.

For a long time i had been bothering my housemate's chic to hook me up with one of her cute University buddies. The fact that she knows how i do things she wasnt willing to hook me up.
Then one day she loosens her grip and gives me a number to call. Mbu her best friend. And on this particular day i hadn't asked for any hook ups.

One call follows the other. thirty minutes, forty minutes and even an hour long call and things are all positive. Its not untill i bragged to my housemate how his chic had hooked me up and "i was in Business" that things started crambling. Dude laughed so hard and all he could say was "tekaliyo" loosely translated "she is not haaaat".
Actually he reminded me of how we had met her in Wandegeya sometime back.........OMG.

From then on the calls from my side reduced drastically but shortie wasn't ready to give up. Misery is during my quest to prove so serious a dude, i'd given her both my mobile phone numbers. She started caling me when she is sick, bored, hungry, feeling low and expected solutions or words of comfort from me.

Calls from her became so frequent that i started telling lies of how very busy i was and make promises to call back. She would wait exactly thirty minutes and call back opening the conversation with an apology for calling again b4 i did.
Now my boys noticed and wondered who it was. Its not my style talking to ladies on the phone with a screwed up face and a non sexy cold voice. All i could them was thar there is a ka-orangatan making my life a living hell.

The other night she called just to let me know how she was in bed nude. I jokingly asked if i could join her in her bed and she accepted. When i announced it was a joke, she asked me to visit her the following day and get kinky. This is a true story by the way. Reminded me how she sleeps alone at her University.

Ofcourse i didnt show up and the next day at 18.00hrs Ugandan time she was calling to inquire if i was on my way to her place. I lied. 9pm, she kols.....i lied some more.)3.30am she kols again and this time i lost it. Gave her a busy tone. In the morning. as i was fighting for a taxi in Ntinda, another call come in.
Maaaaaaaaan, am in trouble.

Just wondering what i shoud do!

Remember me and this chic have never met.

Friday, September 5, 2008


Of late i am so into hosting ma friends to my house for house parties. Of course i dont fund them its always collective efforts with the boys. In the last one month ive had two good ones.
My favourite though was the one for ma birthday. Couldnt have it on the exact date but a week later. During the course of the week all was set as i was the treasure.
Come d-day and i have to go for a workmate's kwanjula which didnt go down with the boys as wat kind of party wd that be minus the host and birthday boy. kwanjula was for bakiga so the flow of alcohol was abnormal and remember we wea the bako but these guys didnt want to know. All they wanted to see where blazed people allover the place.

back to the party. Guys are calling me at about 7pm and all is set. The dudes are all home but no single female. I almost passed out in disbelief.
One hour later guys are calling and all they could say was............''on fire''. The ladies where in the house and having fun. However, they were all not amused that the host was away.
Yu shd have seen how i rushed back home.

From the roadside i just felt for ma neighbours. Noise was unbearable. I walked in clad in my kanzu and mo noise.
One and i mean one cutie caught my eye. Never had there been so many beautiful gals in my house at the same time be4. Misery was Toni the guy who stays in the house above mine had my gals attention. Sorry i meant the gal i had eyes on. At all costs this one was meant to be mine. Dude drank himsellf silly and passed out. So i my selefu and i took over. Lies, lies and mo lies. I actually told her i have a wife with two kids in france. Dont know whats wrong with beautiful Ugandan gals nowadays. This line ive used sooooooo many times and never lets me down.
This gal wasnt taking any alcohol but seemed more intoxicated than anyone at the party. She had her legs on ma head, ma back, the ceiling, under the chair, tickling me................damn, i was in trouble. Lie, lies and mo lies...sorry lyrics, lyrics and mo nice words and shit was tight on ma side. It was for only one ma boy who was making great use of ma room but i almost broke my 1 year and three months self imposed fast on chau. Damn, ive never been this tempted b4. Chic kept assuring me of how stary i was. Making her do crazy things while sober. She had no excuse but to accept that some ugandan chaps are not for jokes.

Anyway, i had a blast and thank god i didnt break my fast. The other times we have met is pretty face is high which makes her not so tempting. This comfirms the saying that unlike poles repell.

Having a house party 2mrw, waiting for the next suprise.

Thursday, September 4, 2008


Today is the second day on my new job and believe me am not as excited as expected.
Yu can't believe but am sad. Missing the good life i've been enjoying the last one month since i resigned my earlier job.
The last one month was so enjoyable. I would sleep in the day and go out in the night.

Brief outline of ma past one month.

1. 3 a.m till midday.........................sleeping.

2. midday to 1pm...........................freshen up.

2. Switch on ma telly to see what those fools in the BBA 3 house are up to.
But i was always dissappointed as id always find the same. No sex as yet. Morris
is so weak. A beautiful daft chic allover his a** and no action as yet. That guy is
not Ugandan.

3. 2pm................fix ma'self something to eat. was getting boring as it was
always rice and beef/ chicken as it is the easiest meal to prepare.

4. Meanwhile ma fon is always off the hook and it always felt good assuring my past
clients that i resigned. Then the part where my former boss would call asking me to return to work yet it was same fool giving me sh*t. (Oke not Lynn but Humphrey).

5. boys would jealously call in to find out if am home or i went back to work. I always assured them that am home having fun. And remeber they all know my house is never short of drink and food. 30 minutes later and about 3 guys are colliding at my house all escaping from work.

6. 4pm to late............Party, party and more party.

7. 8pm to 9pm...........guys are now calling their bosses assuring them of how they
wouldnt make it to work the following day due to various reasons. Believe me one dude re-
mixed that ad on radio of a guy who called his bossssssss.............
The one's who had made it lucky with the ladies where calling their wives
assuring them of the vigil they were attending that night. Vigil indeed as sm1
was bound to die.........

8. 9pm to 3am.................drink, telly, bar, anything to make me smile.

And the cycle would go on.

This all sounds so smoooth. Ofcourse there were bad times as well. Like the numerous times i went to my next door kiosk to ask for 20 thousand shillings after generously spending the night before.

There were those times when i didnt have any money on me but had piles of food and alcohol in the house.

The fact that i had no job would also bother me at times. How was i to spoil my first born french baby, and second borne mukiga baby with no job.

Then there were those bu-gals who wanted to make my house a place to get free drink and food on a daily. Atleast they would clean the house and the dishes.

And ofcourse browsing the net from home. Damn, that was the most expensive thing. Made me miss work and the free internet.

Otherwise it always felt so good moving around town in my jeans, tee shirt and boots on a wednesday afternoon and not a tie.

Friday was the best. No reports to present at the weekly operations meeting, but simply sleep with so much rock music pumping in my head.

I was leading a very good life that some of my unfocused friends thought of leaving their jobs too. I went thru hell trying to convince them not to.

But as that famous lines goes...........all good things come to an end. Am now at work.

And on a very sad note, ma housemate is resigning his job tomorrow. As i speak he is home now for the second day running with the excuse of being sick. Atleast he has another job coming his way but i think i played a role..........sob sob

Tuesday, July 8, 2008


The month of June 2008 is one that i will leave to remember all my life. damn like is a b***h indeed.
I mean how can yu have the best and worst weekend of all your life. believe me it happened to me.
back to the month of June emphasis being on the last week. June 21st i invite my boys for a small drink at my house. small as i less than 5 crates of beer for 10 guys and 9 chics.
24th i go for Rock night in a long time and meet my favourite writer. meet my friend's chic for the 2nd time in life, be nice to her and she is impressed. Meet another female secie jazz her up and buddy's chics is getting jealous. I wonder why coz i dont think she would have offered what i wanted from fresh new chic.
Next thing i know buddy's chic and new chic are exchanging. I couldnt believe i could still spark a fight between two lovely chics. aaam, way too unattractive nowadays. By the way ive sparked fights before and am not proud of it.
Anyway chics later realise am not taking non home so they give up the fight.
Buddy's friend decides to find solace in her American friend. Goes ahead and introduces the dude. We be crazy with my boy and introduce yankee to some Ugandan madness. Guy is enjoying and later blunders. He refused to ululate. I hear thats for Africans. Poor thing didnt know that the previous laughing was to help us be as non-racist as possible. There and then he was asked to present his visa and work permit. Poor thing sweated like .....watever.
Buddy's chic sees this as an opportunity t repay me for earlier cruelty. Dude, she yells at me assuring me how mean i am. Assured me how we weren't going 2gether. Shit......p***y just went by just like that. Gave her her bag and what does she do puts it on a stool and asks for her drink.. Thank God am a changed man now. We dropped her off in Mutungo, drove to nt.....oh home and SLEPT MY BEER OFF.
Friday, work, more beer in the evening, saturday more beer. Three pretty chics for company and instead went off with my mom's(R.I.P) agemates till 5am. ( Thats for another day)

Saturde have to escort one of binge mates to officialy declare himself the official molester of some nice innocent chic. Remember we had slept in the morning. Thats for 2mrw.

To crown off my nice weekend, mine friend, brother, binge mate, look alike was pronounced missing reportedly drowned in Lake Victoria on saturde while on a family cruise.

Monday, May 12, 2008


This is one bloody show ill never forget.

Friday 09th May 2008. I woke up in very high spirits.
No i wasn't drunk. I dont go 4 rock night anymo as my
boss had started realising that my Friday input aint worth
my pay.
So on this particular Friday, i was in high moods as usual.
Got to work in my funny sky blue ''corporate'' shirt, wrote
my weekly report and by midday my work was over.
Time to start lounging.
My little cousin calls and reminds me of some senegalese
performing in town. The reminder was supposed to earn him free
beers from me .Check my wallet and i got money for only 20 beers
in my favourite kafunda in bugos.
One of my clients comes in and hands me 20k so i have 40 beers.
Not a bad start for a friday. I'll buy 20 beers, and my lounger friends
will continue from from there.
Time check 14.00hrs and my cousin calls to comfirm if am on the show!
Then some Doctor friend calls and tells me to pick my ka dime of 180thou.whoooooooa.(T.G.I.F)
Am now definately on for the show. Didnt see any better way to clear all this dime than going for tha show.
Rushed to town, picked the dimes, and as i was rushing back to offfice one of the usual loungers shakespeare gives me a buzz saying he is already in Lugogo getting blazyngoed for the show. Time check 16.00hrs.
Rushed to the nearest outlet and purchased my ticket.....can yu believe that?
Hit office, switched off my computer and then rushed to Lugogo.
Fisrt thing i saw was beer. I was too hungry to eat so i settled for a beer, and another, some bond 7, saw 2 lovely Ugandans made acquaintancesand later ordered drinks for them.
Its now getting dark and ma vision is blurred. One Ugandan looks fresher than the other so i settle for she. We drink, dance, talk and life is good for all of us.
She is rubbing her yu know wat on me and am enjoying. Some goon notices and decides to end my fun. He realised i had too much money to spend on booze yet his kids had no tuiton fees. On realising i had lost the money, i just kept quite as my fun wasn't meant to end here.Atleast i had beautiful Ugandan doing nice things to me.
Show was oba how? i dont remember except the part when Akon was right next to me. Guy is no different from me save for the weights of our wallets.
Show is over and i got only 30thou, my blazyngoes, and ofcourse beautiful Ugandan by my side.
Left for some Irish pub with the drunken loungers and beautiful one by my side.
Time check 4.00am and am too tired to pareeeeeeeee no more.
So i ask my lounger to drop us home. Got to my gate and i dont want any1 to share my bed with me. So i let my lounger celebrate with beautiful Ugandan.

If he got lucky i dont know but i woke up to a very rude text from beautiful ugandan and believe me i couldnt remenber meeting any1 by the name B***** at the show.

Right now am off booze till next Friday. Yu never know i may meet another beautiful Ugandan and this time i wont be so good to my friends.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

yeah right

Been very good at reading other people's stuff and
its now my turn to put down smthing for others to read.
Need i introduce my self?????? naaah, coz whoever is
looking at this page right now surely knows me.
One of my mentors i must admit is Antipop. damn this
lady doesnt only possess good looks but the brains too.
There yu go all yu people out there who think there are
no ladies that possess both good looks and brains. Put yo
money where yo mouths are. Me and her go along way and
all that she writes is true.
Enough of that garb. Dont have to be so boring on my first
Didnt know writing would be this little interesting. Thought it
was a bore all thru.

Damn, its 7minutes to 5.00pm. I gat to go home. Oh oh no lies.
Got to go to my kafunda for a beer, supper then retire to my den
late in the night.